covering lies while smiling,
“I love you Mom. You’re the best. Thanks for the car keys.”
Gorging on love given away like whip crème
sprayed directly in the mouth
from the red and white can in the fridge.
What was it I missed,
raising a boy into a talented creative man
With opportunities I could only dream about?
Giving away every item of love I wished for from one
Who was incapable of giving anything but food.
Whether circumstance or lack of understanding precipitated
The inability to give a daughter what she needed.
So I gave what I never received
Certain that love given as joy, as hope,
Would grow, would nurture his soul
This wanted child I longed for and cherished.
I’m lost, wandering through years I’ve lived
Not knowing what went wrong.
Does anyone else comprehend such loss?
Mountains high with regrets
Why should one continue to breathe?
We foolish humans worry about serial killers
Strangers coming from shadows with torture unimaginable.
When the pain of being rejected by your child
Can cause you to wish your breathing would cease
All rights reserved. ©2010 by Sara Fryd